gra-dult-hood n.

1. A stage in life between graduation and adulthood.
2. Gradulthood often involves jobs that don't fulfil a graduate's expectations.
3. A term coined during the recession.

A Gradult Needs A Home: Part 1

With a two week internship blossoming into something more long term the onus has fallen on me to find somewhere to live. I have been involved with this process before, whilst in Leeds I lived in four houses in four years. However I was always on the periphery of the search. Sure I’d turn up for the viewings, trundle along behind my prospective housemates and nod my head approvingly when I thought I should. I don’t recall ever making a relevant comment to an estate agent though. Infact my approval of the house usually depended on how long the search had dragged on for. By the fifth house of the afternoon I’d be arguing whether a toilet door was really necessary and fairly sure I could put up with a year without a sink. ‘It’ll be fine, we’ll do our washing up in the bathroom. Or we’ll just use paper plates. Let’s just go home and watch a couple of episodes of Friends’.

As a gradult alone in the capital I now have to shoulder the burden. This is my time to shine. No longer can I idly flick through an estate agent leaflet. No longer can I chuck a couple of fruitless searches into Google then go back to photos 66-118 of that girl who was in my mate’s seminar. I don’t care how much he’s raving about the Ibiza 09 album. There’s work to be done.

But it’s arduous. First port of call is Gumtree. Every gradult must have done their time on Gumtree. I see it as the cyber version of an NHS walk in centre, when you need it you’re glad it’s there, but it’s never an enjoyable experience and you wouldn’t visit it out of choice. It’s usually about a month into a job search that I head to Gumtree. Hoping that I can perhaps sift through the hundreds of empty promises and maybe, just maybe find some gainful employment, it’s never happened for me.

Maybe Gumtree flat hunting will be better? Maybe that’s where the website shines. At first there was almost too much choice for me and there lies the problem. I became a house hunting snob. I was disregarding potential flats for having a poor photo of the property. Well if they’re not going to do a light reading then why should I live with them? I don’t even own a camera. I’m disregarding properties for having an unprofessional email address!? Was only a few months ago that I was conducting business from Dear Joe, unfortunately your application was unsuccessful, but you sound like a fun guy.

Worst of all is my sudden disdain for improper use of the English language. One spelling mistake and my nose turns skyward. How dare you not double check your OFFICIAL GUMTREE ADVERT! I’m furious! It seems one grammatical error is all it takes to lose me as a housemate. The flat hunting snob I’ve become, it’s a lucky escape.

BTW – If you are in the South East London area and want to open up your home to a pernickety gradult then drop me a line at the email address on the side.

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